Hubby and I are back on the healthy food band wagon. I have 30 lbs to lose. He needs to work on his good cholesterol and triglycerides. We've had success before but have really been lax since IJ was conceived. All I wanted to eat were grilled cheese and mashed potatoes-- makes for some high calorie carb-loading.
So, we are re-visiting our favorite healthy recipes. Last night it was Dal Tacos from Vegetarian Times magazine. These are SO tasty. Just be sure to use whole lentils. The split red cooked in half the time and I had way too much water left. Also, I added a bit of sugar and lemon to the yogurt sauce, skipping the mint altogether. Lastly, we always skip the bean sprouts, but that's just our taste. Enjoy.
Indian Dal Tacos
Alternative to the everyday veggie bean taco!
Ingredients
1/2 cup Diced onion
3/4 tsp. Ground cumin
1/4 tsp. Plus 1/8 tsp. turmeric
1/2 tsp. Plus 1/8 tsp. salt, divided
1/4 tsp. Ground black pepper
2/3 cup Yellow split lentils, sorted, rinsed, and drained
1/2 cup Plain low-fat Greek yogurt
1/3 cup Diced cucumber
1 tbs. Freshly chopped mint
4 6-inch corn or flour tortillas, warmed
1 cup Thinly sliced fresh spinach
1 cup Mung bean sprouts
Preparation
1, Heat nonstick skillet over medium-high heat, and coat with cooking spray. Add onion, and cook 5 minutes, or until softened and starting to brown. Stir in cumin, turmeric, 1/2 tsp. salt, and pepper. Add lentils and 2 1/2 cups water. Bring to a boil, cover, and reduce heat to medium-low. Simmer 40 minutes, or until lentils are cooked but still hold their shape. There will be 1 to 2 Tbs. liquid left in pan.
2. Meanwhile, combine yogurt, cucumber, mint, and remaining 1/8 tsp. salt in bowl.
3. Fill tortillas with spinach, bean sprouts, and lentil mixture. Drizzle with yogurt mixture or serve on side.
Cook's Notes
Yellow lentils or dal can be found in Indian markets, but orange or brown lentils can also be used here.
Makes 4 Servings
Nutrient Info per serving
Calories: 213
Total Fat: 1.5
Carbohydrates: 38
Protein: 14
Sodium: 393
Fiber: 3
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
NCSS More Sleep Logs and a Lapse
So I'll post the ones I could recall here. I'm debating adding two days to the log for missed days-- but I don't think I'll be that rigid about it. I'll just do better. Hey, this is a miracle...I'm forsaking cooking, cleaning, laundry and rest to post this here. So I'm happy with that.
By the way, you can double-click on a log page to view it up close. I changed the formatting a bit...sorry, like I said...a wee bit disorganized (but gettting better!).
What I learned over these past four days:
~ I shouldn't skip days...it hurts my brain to try to think back and remember what happened
~ Morning nap time is about 2 hours after wake-up, instead of 3 hrs, if she wakes up for the day before 7 am.
~ It never pays to interupt baby's routine. When morning nap was delayed due to my late shopping trip, it messed us up for the whole day. I was so tired! I'm pondering what to do tomorrow when I have my mom's group from 9-12...argh. And then there's church too.
Well, four more days left! Then hubby and I will sit down, evaluate and tweak the routine-- based on Pantley's advice :) We just started reading more at night, so it will be nice to have time to revisit her suggestions.
So far, love the bath time/ bed time routine and keeping naps as consistent as possible.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
No-Cry Sleep Solution
Two days of logging are complete! I'm rather proud of myself for sticking to it! Of course, I have 8 more days to go until the first review and tweaking of the routines.
Here's what Day 1 looked like:
Here's what Day 1 looked like:
You'll have to pardon my photo layout..I'm new to this whole blogging thing and they don't want to go where I want them to go. As you can see, IJ took one nap which met her "nap quota" for the day. Then she slept for almost ten hours at night, but she cried in her sleep due to teething-related runny nose, I suspect. She had one full blown wake up. We've been following the initial bedtime routine of bath, play and rock/bottle-down after Jeopardy, at 8pm. I can't seem to get away from the Jeopardy thing-- I think she might think of Alex Trebek as an Uncle when she is older! I also made some eating/poop notes just to see if digestion is affecting any of this.
Wow was Day 2 different! Her front tooth is making its way in and all the runny nose that goes with it made it really hard to sleep. After hearing her cry every hour during hte night of Day 1, I was eagerly awaiting morning nap. But it came and went as the coughing just didn't allow her to sleep. The second I laid her down the post-nasal drip began and she was awake in ten minutes, frustrated with her body. The afternoon nap went the same. So we put her in the car to go to the store with the expectation that sitting upright would allow her to sleep and she would be asleep in a heartbeat. No such luck! That little girl was content as can be, chatting up a storm in the back seat! She looked like she was recovering from pneumonia as she was so tired, but she was in really good spirits-- even when I made my hubby take a detour home so we could try to spot Clive Owen filming his new movie, Trusted...or Trust...or something lihe that! No luck on that front either, but it was neat to see all the tents and the film crew.
All in all, yesterday was a good reminder about the "best laid plans" and how they go awry sooner or later. It reminded me that this routine is helpful, but primarily I must meet my daughter where she is. This is not about controlling her sleep, but setting up the conditions in which to make sleep possible and inviting for her. It doesn't always mean that she'll welcome the invitation, whether it's due to the latest runny nose, a growth spurt or something I can't even detect.
I'm looking forward to the next 8 days of logging and the review on Day 10! I'll keep posting the logs every couple days-- but will probably leave most of the commentary until the Day 10 Tweak.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
No-Cry Sleep Solution: Let the Games Begin
So here it goes. I finally managed to make copies of the sleep/nap/ routine log from the book. We've been following a rough routine though for the past few days, even with the current events that have been going on. It's really been a blessing to know about when she will nap, and to make time for that to happen. I.J. also seems much more rested, and I can more easily determine why is she is cranky at any given time. Or, I can at least rule out whether it's sleep-related.
Here's what I've discovered so far, without doing the logs....
~ IJ naps about 3-4 hours after morning wake-up. That nap lasts 1-2 hours.
~ She eats breakfast about one hour after wakeup (but wakes up with bottle)
~ She likes to play after wakeup from nap/bedtime, before she's willing to sit in high chair to eat
~ Bedtime routine is priceless...dinner, bathtime, crazy play time during Jeopardy and then bottle and rock down-- this has been working like clock-work on most days
~ One day of an "off" day doesn't ruin the routine for the next day. She seems to recover pretty fast, but we try not to make a habit of it.
We've had a couple days where we just couldn't do the routine. For instance yesterday she napped for just an hour in the morning, as I suspect her teething or poopy dipe woke her up. She wasn't interested in going back to sleep. Then she didn't take an afternoon nap until the drive home from the doctor's office -- which was at 5pm. She ended up sleeping all night though. That was great! In fact, a few days I've gotten up before her. But she's had at least one nighttime wakeup-- but that's an incredible improvement from where we were at the day we started the book and the routines.
I just want to add a disclaimer that this is not "sleep training". We always go to her when she cries and comfort her back to sleep. I'm not completely against letting her sleep with us if she's have a sick or needy day for whatever reason- but I don't want it to be the habit so that we can all sleep well and be happy and healthy. Trying to fill her up on quality mommy time during the day is what I think will help with this. It's hard to stop and hold her tons during the day and still keep a clean house- but my goal is to do that. Yesterday we had uninterrupted play time and it was really nice- and more important than any stinkin' dishes in the sink. Eventually, it will be good for her to be able to go to sleep without the bottle. My plan is to start working on that around 13 months or a little sooner. Pantley has the "Gentle Removal Plan" that you use to help littles learn to sleep without bottle, breast or paci. But first things first!
Darn, I forgot to turn on the baby monitor and I think I hear her crying. Well, that's one way to extend nap times! Oops! Better go get my baby :)
Tomorrow I'll post the first official log page!
(p.s. Sorry for any grammatical errors, but if I'm going to be faithful in writing, many days I just don't have the time for proofreading. Maybe someday I'll evolve to that level.)
Here's what I've discovered so far, without doing the logs....
~ IJ naps about 3-4 hours after morning wake-up. That nap lasts 1-2 hours.
~ She eats breakfast about one hour after wakeup (but wakes up with bottle)
~ She likes to play after wakeup from nap/bedtime, before she's willing to sit in high chair to eat
~ Bedtime routine is priceless...dinner, bathtime, crazy play time during Jeopardy and then bottle and rock down-- this has been working like clock-work on most days
~ One day of an "off" day doesn't ruin the routine for the next day. She seems to recover pretty fast, but we try not to make a habit of it.
We've had a couple days where we just couldn't do the routine. For instance yesterday she napped for just an hour in the morning, as I suspect her teething or poopy dipe woke her up. She wasn't interested in going back to sleep. Then she didn't take an afternoon nap until the drive home from the doctor's office -- which was at 5pm. She ended up sleeping all night though. That was great! In fact, a few days I've gotten up before her. But she's had at least one nighttime wakeup-- but that's an incredible improvement from where we were at the day we started the book and the routines.
I just want to add a disclaimer that this is not "sleep training". We always go to her when she cries and comfort her back to sleep. I'm not completely against letting her sleep with us if she's have a sick or needy day for whatever reason- but I don't want it to be the habit so that we can all sleep well and be happy and healthy. Trying to fill her up on quality mommy time during the day is what I think will help with this. It's hard to stop and hold her tons during the day and still keep a clean house- but my goal is to do that. Yesterday we had uninterrupted play time and it was really nice- and more important than any stinkin' dishes in the sink. Eventually, it will be good for her to be able to go to sleep without the bottle. My plan is to start working on that around 13 months or a little sooner. Pantley has the "Gentle Removal Plan" that you use to help littles learn to sleep without bottle, breast or paci. But first things first!
Darn, I forgot to turn on the baby monitor and I think I hear her crying. Well, that's one way to extend nap times! Oops! Better go get my baby :)
Tomorrow I'll post the first official log page!
(p.s. Sorry for any grammatical errors, but if I'm going to be faithful in writing, many days I just don't have the time for proofreading. Maybe someday I'll evolve to that level.)
Monday, November 9, 2009
Glory Baby
Today we went for our follow-up appointment. No heartbeat at all. She has passed on straight to heaven (can we blame her?). We left the doctor's office with lots of hope, though. He did tell us that at my age (over 35) 40-50% of pregnancies will result in miscarriage...ouch. So, DH (dear Husband) and I decided not to wait. We had Izzy a year earlier in a race against endo and time, and we have no regrets. Last week was hard. This weekend was easier. And now, being home after the doctors appt, is hard again. I keep trying to focus on the fact that we have an angel in heaven, watching out for us. Praying for us. The doctor said that the first two cycles after a miscarriage are the most fertile. He said that there's a scientific reason but he feels there may be a spiritual one as well-- a little baby in heaven asking God to cheer up her mom and dad. And a God who can't say no to such a sweet little angel. I love that idea.
Here's a rather uplifting song about a miscarriage. I consider it a nice tribute to Abigail, Abby. So I posted it here along with the lyrics. The video isn't the highest quality, but you can also buy the single on Itunes.
If anyone else is reading this who has had a miscarriage, blessings and healing to you. We feel your pain.
Glory baby you slipped away as fast as we could say baby…baby..
You’ll kiss our tears away
When we’re home to stay But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
‘till mom and dad can hold you… Thursday, November 5, 2009
So Sad
Wow. I remember talking to a friend who had a miscarriage. She said she never thought she would ever feel so sad about such a loss. I'm glad I heard that because today it hit me like a semi-truck. It was just lingering in the background until I bumped into a woman from my lactation support group from when DD was born. I came home from the grocery store and started crying because I couldn't find my cell phone. And I couldn't stop crying. Hubby helped me put DD to bed and then he and I laid down. I cried, he rubbed my back, and the two of us fell asleep.
It feels like we've lost a family member...along with all of our hopes and dreams for that person.
We didn't plan on getting pregnant so soon after DD. It would have been a challenge. But it was one I couldn't wait to take on. I was looking forward to sorting through old baby clothes, moving the co-sleeper back into our bedroom, and fixing up the guest room to eventually welcome our new lifetime guest. I had some remorse over things that I didn't get to do before having another baby. For instance, I wanted to lose all that old baby weight, have a couple drinks with friends, eat some sushi, work on the house, go on vacation, etc. Most of those little wishes weren't mutually exclusive with having a baby. Some would just need postponement. Today, they all feel like stupid insignificant aspirations that were being postponed by something grander.
Maybe we wouldn't have been able to handle two young kids, so close in age. Maybe it would have been a financial stress. Maybe. But who knows. Perhaps it was what the doctor described it as... "Not a waste of time". "A genetic thing that we can't control". All I know is that I still hang on his words that reassured us and made me so thankful I had returned to a Christian medical practice, "You will see your baby one day in heaven".
He also mentioned that we would feel loss and we will mourn. So I'm not sure why I'm so surprised. I mourn the dreams I had. The rocking, the holding, the loving that I won't get to do with Abigail.
I just wish, like a child, that I could just feel better right now. It sucks being sad. I need to go look up the stages of grief and miscarriage support groups. I doubt it will speed things along..but at least a group would help me from burying all this sadness and having it crop up later. And looking stuff up on the computer makes me feel like I'm doing "something". Maybe it's avoidance. Maybe. Wish this mourning stuff were more neat and orderly. Wish so much that Abigail were here. Today was the first day that I prayed to God for a miracle-- that we would go into the dr's office on Monday and the heartbeat would be as strong as ever. Then I would get to nurture this baby in my womb and hug her so tight once she was born. If it was a "he" we could make his middle name Lazurus. But there aren't many Lazurus stories. There are many more of God comforting us in our sorrow. That reminds me of what Jesus did when he heard that Lazurus had died, and befored he raised him from the dead. One of the most powerful lines of scripture: Jesus wept. There's not much else to add to it. He wept. And in doing so he reminded us for all eternity that God weeps with us. He does not rejoice in our sorrow, or ask us to mask it. He weeps. And we are made in His perfect image. So it is right that we cry too.
John 11:33-36 (New International Version)
33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled.
34 "Where have you laid him?" he asked.
"Come and see, Lord," they replied.
35 Jesus wept.
36 Then the Jews said, "See how he loved him!"
It feels like we've lost a family member...along with all of our hopes and dreams for that person.
We didn't plan on getting pregnant so soon after DD. It would have been a challenge. But it was one I couldn't wait to take on. I was looking forward to sorting through old baby clothes, moving the co-sleeper back into our bedroom, and fixing up the guest room to eventually welcome our new lifetime guest. I had some remorse over things that I didn't get to do before having another baby. For instance, I wanted to lose all that old baby weight, have a couple drinks with friends, eat some sushi, work on the house, go on vacation, etc. Most of those little wishes weren't mutually exclusive with having a baby. Some would just need postponement. Today, they all feel like stupid insignificant aspirations that were being postponed by something grander.
Maybe we wouldn't have been able to handle two young kids, so close in age. Maybe it would have been a financial stress. Maybe. But who knows. Perhaps it was what the doctor described it as... "Not a waste of time". "A genetic thing that we can't control". All I know is that I still hang on his words that reassured us and made me so thankful I had returned to a Christian medical practice, "You will see your baby one day in heaven".
He also mentioned that we would feel loss and we will mourn. So I'm not sure why I'm so surprised. I mourn the dreams I had. The rocking, the holding, the loving that I won't get to do with Abigail.
I just wish, like a child, that I could just feel better right now. It sucks being sad. I need to go look up the stages of grief and miscarriage support groups. I doubt it will speed things along..but at least a group would help me from burying all this sadness and having it crop up later. And looking stuff up on the computer makes me feel like I'm doing "something". Maybe it's avoidance. Maybe. Wish this mourning stuff were more neat and orderly. Wish so much that Abigail were here. Today was the first day that I prayed to God for a miracle-- that we would go into the dr's office on Monday and the heartbeat would be as strong as ever. Then I would get to nurture this baby in my womb and hug her so tight once she was born. If it was a "he" we could make his middle name Lazurus. But there aren't many Lazurus stories. There are many more of God comforting us in our sorrow. That reminds me of what Jesus did when he heard that Lazurus had died, and befored he raised him from the dead. One of the most powerful lines of scripture: Jesus wept. There's not much else to add to it. He wept. And in doing so he reminded us for all eternity that God weeps with us. He does not rejoice in our sorrow, or ask us to mask it. He weeps. And we are made in His perfect image. So it is right that we cry too.
John 11:33-36 (New International Version)
33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled.
34 "Where have you laid him?" he asked.
"Come and see, Lord," they replied.
35 Jesus wept.
36 Then the Jews said, "See how he loved him!"
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
God's Promises
I just read a nice phrase that I found in, of all things, a Christmas catalog. It reads, "God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, nor sun without rain. But He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears and light for the way."
That's good to know. Today we went to the doctor's and discovered that our little Abby-Jo has decided not to stay with us. Or perhaps God decided for her. The doctor called it "genetics" and said there's nothing we can do about it. I knew the second I saw the ultrasound screen. My eyes combed it for that magical little heartbeat that I was so amazed to see with our first little girl. Our eyes filled with tears when we heard that first heartbeat. Today our eyes filled with tears for another reason. The heartbeat was incredibly slow, almost undetectable, and Abby was small...too small...even for someone who is supposed to only be the size of a kidney bean right now.
So, it looks as if she is leaving us. And we are incredibly sad.
All the other goals can wait. So can the nap routine. Right now, we just need to say goodbye.
That's good to know. Today we went to the doctor's and discovered that our little Abby-Jo has decided not to stay with us. Or perhaps God decided for her. The doctor called it "genetics" and said there's nothing we can do about it. I knew the second I saw the ultrasound screen. My eyes combed it for that magical little heartbeat that I was so amazed to see with our first little girl. Our eyes filled with tears when we heard that first heartbeat. Today our eyes filled with tears for another reason. The heartbeat was incredibly slow, almost undetectable, and Abby was small...too small...even for someone who is supposed to only be the size of a kidney bean right now.
So, it looks as if she is leaving us. And we are incredibly sad.
All the other goals can wait. So can the nap routine. Right now, we just need to say goodbye.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
The No-Cry Sleep Solution
Jeff and I are a little less in shock now about expecting a second baby next year. DD is 10 months old and will be 18 when our new little bundle of joy arrives. Since DD has been born we've occasionally allowed her to sleep with us -- what the attachment parenting community refers to as "co-sleeping". We did it deliberately, as one of the many tools of helping our little girl feel safe and secure in the world. I think that it helps. It certainly helped me to go back to sleep more quickly after one of her night wakings. But the wakings are anywhere from one to three times a night now. I suspect it is just that she is getting excited about talking and walking- but now that #2 is on the way, I decided it is time to help DD slip better in her crib. Also, she seemed a bit tired and I wondered if our snoring wasn't waking her on occasion.
So I fell back on one of the books I desperately purchased when she was first born-- Elizabeth Pantley's "The No-Cry Sleep Solution". (When she was a newborn I mistakenly went on a baby sleep book shopping spree, not realizing that infant night wakings are normal and healthy) I chose the book in part because it is endorsed by attachment parenting guru, Dr William Sears (he wrote the introduction).
I always wonder if certain books "work". I've seen in various chat communities that some people say Pantley's suggestions work, but some disagree. The problem with those posts is that I'm never sure what aspects they tried, how long they tried, what their children's reactions were to each attempt, etc. So I thought I would blog my experience. To be honest, though, my primary reason is to hold myself accountable to stick to it for at least 1-2 months (the timeline Pantley suggests is necessary to see change). I am not a creature of habit by any means, and following a "routine" of any sort just goes against my very nature. But I know it is good for DD so I will endure, and I will blog to share what I've learned and to emerge myself in the process without giving up prematurely.
So, it began a few days ago as I desperately leafed through the book after DD woke every 2-3 hours all night. All I could do was read because I was too tired to move. The first thing Pantley asks is about our motive for changing baby's sleep behavior. Is it because we think we "have to"? Are we getting pressure from a well-meaning relative, friend, mentor, etc? She asks because it is normal for children to have night wakings up until age three (gasp!). She wants to make sure we are starting this journey for a reason other than peer pressure. I definately am. I am doing it to help DD to be more rested, both day and night. And also, for me to stay sane once I have a second little waking me (well, I should say "waking us", my hubby will be on summer break, thank God!).
Now that I know I have the right motives (i.e. desperation not peer pressure) I read on about the importance of routines. I've always loved the idea of routines and traditions. But they have been abstract notions to me, or something to envy in others. My husband is the master of regularity in all he does. He never uses the snooze button and awakes like clock-work at the same time each day. He follows the same morning routine at home and then when he arrives at school. After work, he has an afternoon routine that he follows...put his belongings away, wash his dishes, make the next day's lunch, etc. When I was working I often had to make last minute lunch runs to the nearby grocery store to find something healthy. It wasn't fun being so disorganized, but it is oh-so-hard to change.
Pantley explains that baby's thrive on routine. They like to know what comes next (has someone asked a baby if this is so?). I trust that judgment, I suppose. There is reassurance in knowing what to expect. So Pantley explains that one of the first steps is to lay out (and follow!) a daytime and nighttime routine. She gives suggestions but lots of flexibility. I've decided to make this routine sacred-- nothing can interfere with it with the exception of church and my mom's group-- until DD's sleep improves and we see fewer nightwakings. Here's what I've started so far.....
Daytime: First step was to get a semi-regular eating schedule.
Somewhere between 8 - 9am: Breakfast
Playtime
2-3 hours after wake time, first nap of the day
Wake around noon to one pm.
After half hour of wake time, Lunch.
Playtime until Mom has to leave for work or go on errands (I work 3x per week and drive DD to work where DH picks her up-- she usually naps a bit from 2:45 until 3:30 and this is the only afternoon nap).
6pm or so, dinner.
6:45 or so, bathtime! (my favorite new routine!) DD LOVES this!
PJ's and then some final playtime while Mom and Dad watch Jeopardy.
8pm Night bottle and rock down in Living Room.
Pantley suggests keeping a log of sleep/eating and then reviewing it every 10 days and tweak if necessary. I haven't been keeping my log, except in my head. So I'm going to start today and count out 10 days. I can already see where I would like to tweak things. I don't like that she goes to sleep in our arms with the tv on in the background. As she gets older she's going to want to watch tv and I don't want to let her until she's two-- and even then, it will be a half hour of Mister Rogers a day-- or Blue's Clues as both are "real-time" shows. Jeopardy, unfortunately, doesn't fit in that plan. I'm debating the possibility of letting her play in her room. But that wouldn't work as it would make her room a playtime room. Hmmmm. Think I will carry on with the living room fall asleep for the first ten days and then try a revision for the second ten days. Also, Pantley suggests introducing a "lovey". This is a blanket or doll that baby can associate with sleep- thus helping her transition from play to rest. The glitch is that it shouldn't have button eyes- which all of her animals do, including her favorite, The Grinch. So I'm on the hunt for an eye-less lovey. And then I'm going to stuff it in my shirt and wear it around so it smells like me. Sounds like crazy behavior, but I'm willing to be crazy if it means more sleep for both of us!
Lastly, Pantley has a few pages in which she's written out the essentials of our plan, allowing for some flexibility. It's more of a pledge than a plan. I'm going to get that on paper so that for each ten day period I can remind myself and my hubby of what we are doing. Eventually, this won't be so much work, but second nature-- sort of like, I suspect, training a dog. But I won't go so far as to call this training. I don't feel that it is at all. I think that it is offering my daughter regularity and predictability. Any person who grew up in chaos will tell you that children probably do thrive on regularity and consistancy. That's my gift to you little girl. Hope I can do it. God help me. (that reminds me, my first step is prayer for God's help!).
So I fell back on one of the books I desperately purchased when she was first born-- Elizabeth Pantley's "The No-Cry Sleep Solution". (When she was a newborn I mistakenly went on a baby sleep book shopping spree, not realizing that infant night wakings are normal and healthy) I chose the book in part because it is endorsed by attachment parenting guru, Dr William Sears (he wrote the introduction).
I always wonder if certain books "work". I've seen in various chat communities that some people say Pantley's suggestions work, but some disagree. The problem with those posts is that I'm never sure what aspects they tried, how long they tried, what their children's reactions were to each attempt, etc. So I thought I would blog my experience. To be honest, though, my primary reason is to hold myself accountable to stick to it for at least 1-2 months (the timeline Pantley suggests is necessary to see change). I am not a creature of habit by any means, and following a "routine" of any sort just goes against my very nature. But I know it is good for DD so I will endure, and I will blog to share what I've learned and to emerge myself in the process without giving up prematurely.
So, it began a few days ago as I desperately leafed through the book after DD woke every 2-3 hours all night. All I could do was read because I was too tired to move. The first thing Pantley asks is about our motive for changing baby's sleep behavior. Is it because we think we "have to"? Are we getting pressure from a well-meaning relative, friend, mentor, etc? She asks because it is normal for children to have night wakings up until age three (gasp!). She wants to make sure we are starting this journey for a reason other than peer pressure. I definately am. I am doing it to help DD to be more rested, both day and night. And also, for me to stay sane once I have a second little waking me (well, I should say "waking us", my hubby will be on summer break, thank God!).
Now that I know I have the right motives (i.e. desperation not peer pressure) I read on about the importance of routines. I've always loved the idea of routines and traditions. But they have been abstract notions to me, or something to envy in others. My husband is the master of regularity in all he does. He never uses the snooze button and awakes like clock-work at the same time each day. He follows the same morning routine at home and then when he arrives at school. After work, he has an afternoon routine that he follows...put his belongings away, wash his dishes, make the next day's lunch, etc. When I was working I often had to make last minute lunch runs to the nearby grocery store to find something healthy. It wasn't fun being so disorganized, but it is oh-so-hard to change.
Pantley explains that baby's thrive on routine. They like to know what comes next (has someone asked a baby if this is so?). I trust that judgment, I suppose. There is reassurance in knowing what to expect. So Pantley explains that one of the first steps is to lay out (and follow!) a daytime and nighttime routine. She gives suggestions but lots of flexibility. I've decided to make this routine sacred-- nothing can interfere with it with the exception of church and my mom's group-- until DD's sleep improves and we see fewer nightwakings. Here's what I've started so far.....
Daytime: First step was to get a semi-regular eating schedule.
Somewhere between 8 - 9am: Breakfast
Playtime
2-3 hours after wake time, first nap of the day
Wake around noon to one pm.
After half hour of wake time, Lunch.
Playtime until Mom has to leave for work or go on errands (I work 3x per week and drive DD to work where DH picks her up-- she usually naps a bit from 2:45 until 3:30 and this is the only afternoon nap).
6pm or so, dinner.
6:45 or so, bathtime! (my favorite new routine!) DD LOVES this!
PJ's and then some final playtime while Mom and Dad watch Jeopardy.
8pm Night bottle and rock down in Living Room.
Pantley suggests keeping a log of sleep/eating and then reviewing it every 10 days and tweak if necessary. I haven't been keeping my log, except in my head. So I'm going to start today and count out 10 days. I can already see where I would like to tweak things. I don't like that she goes to sleep in our arms with the tv on in the background. As she gets older she's going to want to watch tv and I don't want to let her until she's two-- and even then, it will be a half hour of Mister Rogers a day-- or Blue's Clues as both are "real-time" shows. Jeopardy, unfortunately, doesn't fit in that plan. I'm debating the possibility of letting her play in her room. But that wouldn't work as it would make her room a playtime room. Hmmmm. Think I will carry on with the living room fall asleep for the first ten days and then try a revision for the second ten days. Also, Pantley suggests introducing a "lovey". This is a blanket or doll that baby can associate with sleep- thus helping her transition from play to rest. The glitch is that it shouldn't have button eyes- which all of her animals do, including her favorite, The Grinch. So I'm on the hunt for an eye-less lovey. And then I'm going to stuff it in my shirt and wear it around so it smells like me. Sounds like crazy behavior, but I'm willing to be crazy if it means more sleep for both of us!
Lastly, Pantley has a few pages in which she's written out the essentials of our plan, allowing for some flexibility. It's more of a pledge than a plan. I'm going to get that on paper so that for each ten day period I can remind myself and my hubby of what we are doing. Eventually, this won't be so much work, but second nature-- sort of like, I suspect, training a dog. But I won't go so far as to call this training. I don't feel that it is at all. I think that it is offering my daughter regularity and predictability. Any person who grew up in chaos will tell you that children probably do thrive on regularity and consistancy. That's my gift to you little girl. Hope I can do it. God help me. (that reminds me, my first step is prayer for God's help!).
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